We were originally planning an entry on sex toys for yesterday or today, but Jill’s work schedule has made it impossible for her to write anything, and unfortunately she’ll probably be too busy through the end of the week to write anything beyond the briefest of entries. She’ll probably get around to it when her schedule allows, but in the meantime I figured I’d fill the void and write about something else, namely porn and pizza.

We held our first porn and pizza party in summer of 2006. We’d been talking about doing it for at least six months, half-joking, in whispered conversations with friends who, like us, watched porn and weren’t too “proper” to talk about it. I’d gotten the idea from a 2002 movie called Porn ‘n Chicken, based on a club at Yale University that would gather regularly to watch porn and eat Popeye’s Chicken. Since I like pizza better than I like chicken – and since the resulting change was alliterative and therefore catchier-sounding – I began talking about having a porn and pizza party.

At the first party, which we held at Jill’s place, we ordered a couple pizzas from a local restaurant we both liked, and served wine, beer and liquor in addition to soda and water. We watched a couple movies from our DVD collection, and sort of heckled the bad dialogue and plot contrivances, while no doubt wishing we were all tipsy enough to have a giant orgy. When the pizza was eaten and the movies were over, those still sober enough to drive left, while those who weren’t crashed in the guest room (and you know who you are).

Our second porn and pizza party took place in December of 2006. We tried to make it a Christmas-themed affair, but I was only able to find one holiday-related film to show; the other movies we planned to show were unrelated. However, keeping with the theme, we played ambient Christmas music at a low volume throughout the evening. Pizza and libations were more or less the same as they had been at the previous party, and once again we began by watching the movies, laughing at the incompetent acting and dialogue, eating pizza and killing a few bottles of wine.

By the time the pizza was eaten or put away, we had moved on to our second movie of the night. So focused was I on the on-screen happenings that I was the last to notice that it had grown quiet in the room, thanks to two of our guests putting on their own live-action porn film on the couch. Their display, which consisted of the wife giving oral sex to the husband, had everyone else’s attention, and after processing what was happening the rest of us quickly followed suit. After awhile, it was clear that the party had to move to its next logical stage, but no one knew how to start. Finally someone asked if they could use the guest bed. We all went to our own neutral corners, as it were, with Jill and I retreating to our room, and the other couple taking the couch. It was definitely the most fun Christmas party I can remember.

We held our third party in April of last year. Other than the Christmas music, it happened pretty much like the previous one: Porn on television, pizza, wine and beer, followed by head on the couch and sex in private. I would have loved to have had the nerve to suggest that we all stay in the living room, but I figured that if anyone else was into that idea, surely someone would have brought it up. Once we were in our room, going at it wantonly on the bed, the sounds – as well as the thoughts – of what our guests were doing elsewhere, proved an amazing turn-on, leading to what Jill said at the time was the most intense orgasm she had ever had. And me, too.

We hoped to have subsequent parties a bit more often, but our move out of the area (and renting Jill’s old place) meant getting together with our friends less often than we would like. The closest we’ve come was when we had one couple over for dinner and drinks this past New Year’s Eve. There was no pizza, and no plans for porn until the other husband suggested it. We watched a movie until about five minutes to midnight, when we switched it to one of the local stations so we could watch the countdown to the New Year. We planned to put the movie back on, and hopefully have some same-room oral sex at the very least, but by the time we were through watching whichever flavor-of-the-week band was performing on delay from New York, our guests were exhausted and went to bed. It was, very likely, the end of a (short-lived) era.

On the rare occasion that another porn and pizza party is brought up, it’s back to being spoken of in a whispered, half-joking manner. Nonetheless, these get-togethers were exhilarating and fun, and help reinforce the notion that having sex in the next room can be just as hot as doing it in the very same room.

-Jack