Carla’s feet rested against Maggie’s hips as she explored beneath the beaded silk.  Maggie pushed the dress up, letting it bunch at Carla’s waist as her tongue lapped and licked with abandon.  The intensity was too much, and she soaked Maggie’s face as orgasm overcame her.

Their bodies pressing together, they kissed hard, passionately, as though it were simultaneously the first time and the last.

They lay together in dreamy silence.  Maggie spoke:  “I was sorry that I didn’t get an invitation.” She savored Carla’s taste on her lips, savored the memories that accompanied it.

Carla’s supple breasts rose and fell urgently as she caught her breath.  “He doesn’t know about this.  About any of it.”

“You could have introduced me as your old college roommate.”  Maggie’s expression indicated half-seriousness, though it was practically the truth.  During college, they spent as much time in the other’s dorm as they did in their own.

More silence.  Maggie expected more of a reaction from her belated wedding present.  She got up, found her panties, and slipped them on.

“Well, glad I got to see you in the dress, anyway.” (187/187)

Behind the Scenes

For the first time in four weeks, a new Flash Fiction Friday prompt has been issued, this one courtesy of Ram the Sunlover.  In addition to the 187-word limit, participants were required to include the word “belated”.  I found the prompt photo fairly inspiring, though it was Jill and not myself who looked at the photo and immediately said, “That’s her belated wedding present.”

My first draft was a mere ninety words long.  Though it was very lean and far less detailed than the final draft, this initial take told the complete story.  I actually prefer it when my first draft is drastically under-budget, as it gives me some breathing room and allows me to flesh out aspects of the story that I initially could not.  I padded the story with some florid description, though in my opinion what was added doesn’t seem like fluff.

True to form, I forgot to include the required word, and after writing what was to be the final draft I spent twenty minutes attempting to incorporate mention of the “belated wedding present”.  It was difficult to determine the ideal place for said mention; I wanted Maggie to be the one to use that expression, either in her dialogue or in her inner monologue, and for some reason I had trouble making it sound natural.  Eventually I tacked on the reference in the penultimate paragraph, but I worry that it sounds stilted.

Deleted Scenes

Thanks in part to the larger-than-expected word allotment, there was nothing that had to be trimmed.  Quite the opposite; as stated above, I added a bit of prose to pad the story.  I also considered ending the story with Maggie telling Carla, “Maybe you should tell him.”  This would have implied that she was open to a polyamorous relationship with Carla and her new groom, or at the very least a threesome.

Additionally, I considered the title “Wedding Present”, but ultimately decided that it was a little too on-the-nose.  Though perhaps more of an obscure reference, “Bridal Shower” is suitably sexy, as it refers directly to Carla’s orgasmic emission.

Soundtrack

I like the sensual sound of “The Look of Love”, especially Dusty Springfield’s 1967 original.  However, Isaac Hayes’ cover is bold and brassy and would work as well.  Additionally, Sade’s “No Ordinary Love” fits well; the lyrics seem to fit Maggie’s perspective of a lover who has given her all and perhaps feels abandoned.