What are your 50 shades?
Jack’s Answers
1. I enjoy the idea that my partner wants to inflict pain on me that:
a. makes me curious
b. is titillating and sexually arousing
c. that leaves me screaming and/or crying because that’s the way I like it
a. makes me curious
b. is titillating and sexually arousing
c. that leaves me screaming and/or crying because that’s the way I like it
Um, no. As you have undoubtedly surmised if you read our blog regularly, we don’t really practice BDSM. That is to say, we sometimes do things that involve light restraint and maybe an occasional spanking during doggy style (but typically not for its own sake) wherein I am the inflicter, not the recipient; however, actual pain that is identified as such is not our particular kink. A similar question to this one to which I would have had a legitimate answer would be something like, “The idea that my partner wants to inflict pain on me (a) makes me want to break up with her and get a restraining order.”
2. Do you like being forced to dress or act in a way that is humiliating? If yes, please describe. If no, why not?
At the risk of damaging my kinky, non-vanilla rep, no I don’t. Humiliation of any sort (i.e. whether I am giving or receiving) may be one of my few hard limits. That is to say that while there are many things I don’t happen to get off on that I would try if it excited my partner, they are all pretty much the sort of thing that would leave my self-respect intact. But being forced to wear a “Twilight” T-shirt (I assume that’s what the question is referring to)? Oh, hell no.
3. Do you like seeing bruises, scars, or marks that were caused during sex on either you or your partner? What kind of marks?
Although we occasionally have the kind of sex that is so vigorous and energetic that it can be called “rough”, I have never deliberately left a mark on Jill, other than the occasional below-the-neckline hickey. As I can’t imagine that it would be good for her teaching career, I tend to be overly cautious, especially when it comes to leaving obvious marks, i.e. marks that would be visible when clothed. That is not to say that such marks are never left on her; once in awhile I’ll notice a mark on her body and remember that my kisses turned into bites the night before. And while I am generally turned on to recall how excited I must have been, I tend to feel bad about it, like I’ve broken some unspoken rule. I’m not sure why; she is obviously unharmed, and typically she isn’t even aware of the mark.
4. Would you like to be forced to do sexual things that you don’t necessarily like to do? Yes or No.
No, and it’s not just when it comes to sex that I am reluctant to be forced. I typically dislike being forced to do anything that I wouldnt do of my own volition, be it changing a diaper, eating food that I don’t care for, washing laundry, or fucking in a position that doesn’t suit me. Okay, maybe that’s a bad example as I’ve yet to discover or try a position to which I am unsuited. The fact is that there are certain things in the sexual realm that I’ll probably never choose to do, and I certainly would not want to be forced to do them.
5. Do you want to be forced to watch your lover with someone else? Yes, No or It depends.
Hi. Have you been reading my answers? In particular #4? The whole “forced” thing? It’s not happening. I’m not a cuckold, nor do I get off on the subjugation/humiliation factor. So no, I don’t think that being forced to watch Jill with someone else is my cup of tea. It is worth noting that I am not necessarily averse to the idea of watching her with someone else provided that it is consensual and that she enjoys herself. But if I have to be forced, as stated in the question, the answer is going to be no.
6. What dirty (sometimes inappropriate) things do you like to say to your sexual partner?
Here’s where we divert from the theme of vanilla, close-minded squeamishness. Both Jill and I are practiced, expert dirty-talkers, and have little if any reservations when it comes to saying things that could be considered inappropriate. I’ve talked dirty to Jill in church. We’ve had phone sex while she was at work (no students present, obviously). I’ve brought up bedroom scenarios involving people who would probably be very shocked, if not offended, to be involved in such a fashion. In other words, very little is off-limits.
Here’s where we divert from the theme of vanilla, close-minded squeamishness. Both Jill and I are practiced, expert dirty-talkers, and have little if any reservations when it comes to saying things that could be considered inappropriate. I’ve talked dirty to Jill in church. We’ve had phone sex while she was at work (no students present, obviously). I’ve brought up bedroom scenarios involving people who would probably be very shocked, if not offended, to be involved in such a fashion. In other words, very little is off-limits.
Bonus: Finish this statement: I like being powerful in bed because __________ .
I am naturally dominant.
I am naturally dominant.
Jill’s Answers
1. I enjoy the idea that my partner wants to inflict pain on me that:
a. makes me curious
b. is titillating and sexually arousing
c. that leaves me screaming and/or crying because that’s the way I like it
a. makes me curious
b. is titillating and sexually arousing
c. that leaves me screaming and/or crying because that’s the way I like it
B, is titillating and sexually arousing. There are times when Jack pinches or sucks on my nipple so much that it hurts. This is usually right before I have an orgasm. I experience the same thing sometimes with direct pressure on my clit. It drives me wild. Also, I love it when Jack smacks my ass when he’s fucking me doggy style, and when he handcuffs me in an uncomfortable position.
2. Do you like being forced to dress or act in a way that is humiliating? If yes, please describe. If no, why not?
I don’t really care for humiliation play. I don’t like being embarrassed in my everyday life, and it certainly doesn’t excite me to be embarrassed in a sexual fashion. I much prefer to dress sexy, and it turns me on when Jack tells me exactly what he wants me to wear.
3. Do you like seeing bruises, scars, or marks that were caused during sex on either you or your partner? What kind of marks?
I do enjoy it when Jack or I suck or bite so hard that it leaves a mark. To me, that’s sexy because it tells me that we were so turned on that we got a little carried away. One of my favorite pictures of myself is one Jack took of me where I have matching bruises on each of my breasts. So hot. Sometimes Jack makes me cum so hard that I lose control and I accidentally leave scratch marks on him.
I do enjoy it when Jack or I suck or bite so hard that it leaves a mark. To me, that’s sexy because it tells me that we were so turned on that we got a little carried away. One of my favorite pictures of myself is one Jack took of me where I have matching bruises on each of my breasts. So hot. Sometimes Jack makes me cum so hard that I lose control and I accidentally leave scratch marks on him.
4. Would you like to be forced to do sexual things that you don’t necessarily like to do? Yes or No.
I don’t think I would like to be forced to do anything sexually. For example, while I like rough sex, I am not interested in any sort of rape play. I have definitely explored many new sexual experiences that are outside my previously-adhered-to comfort zone. But I never felt forced in doing so. I prefer to be encouraged and supported to try new things rather than being forced to do so.
I don’t think I would like to be forced to do anything sexually. For example, while I like rough sex, I am not interested in any sort of rape play. I have definitely explored many new sexual experiences that are outside my previously-adhered-to comfort zone. But I never felt forced in doing so. I prefer to be encouraged and supported to try new things rather than being forced to do so.
5. Do you want to be forced to watch your lover with someone else? Yes, No or It depends.
I wouldn’t want to be forced to watch Jack have sex with someone else. If and when we have others join us in the bedroom, ideally we would both be active participants, and if I were to just watch at any point, say if I need to take a breather, it would be with consent.
I wouldn’t want to be forced to watch Jack have sex with someone else. If and when we have others join us in the bedroom, ideally we would both be active participants, and if I were to just watch at any point, say if I need to take a breather, it would be with consent.
6. What dirty (sometimes inappropriate) things do you like to say to your sexual partner?
We occasionally include my sisters and my cousins, as well as one of my sisters-in-law, in our dirty fantasy talk. That seems pretty inappropriate in the sense that my family would probably write us both off if they knew. I also like to tell Jack, either verbally or via text message, the things that I would like to do to him, or have him do to me, during family gatherings. We’re so naughty!
We occasionally include my sisters and my cousins, as well as one of my sisters-in-law, in our dirty fantasy talk. That seems pretty inappropriate in the sense that my family would probably write us both off if they knew. I also like to tell Jack, either verbally or via text message, the things that I would like to do to him, or have him do to me, during family gatherings. We’re so naughty!
Bonus: Finish this statement: I like being powerful in bed because __________ .
It turns me on and makes me feel sexy.
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesdayquestions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
As usual, your accompanying pics had me cracking up. Though we obviously sleep on different sides of the bed, I appreciated where you were both coming from with your answers 🙂
Not to say that we totally differ, because we see eye-to-eye on the humiliation and the forced watching…
~Kazi xxx
I wasn’t too sure of the questions this week when I first read them. Pain and humiliation has never been in my area of kink either. But I admit I am really enjoying reading the answers people are giving…makes me think that the vast majority of us enjoy the light bondage and occasional bites over the extreme fetishes described. Overall, a little playful exploration can be good – but it’s becoming obvious more of us prefer the kind of sex that is positive and not designed to attack our esteem and dignity.
“being forced to wear a “Twilight” T-shirt” … that made me almost spit out my coffee! Absolutely hilarious!
Jack.. you and Jill are both major turn on factors for me. The thought of ya’ll at my house has been in our fantasies a few times..ok more than a few. I would love to be dominated by you or her. The thought alone has already got certain parts of my anatomy speaking in tongues currently.. ahem. I LOVE LOVE LOVE bites, marks from those umm yeah just as exciting. Like Jill I see them and remember which can get me horny all over again. What I would give to have ya’ll for a week in KY.. damn damn damn..
I have to say I was surprised at the number of different NO pictures here today. I do see that Jack is very dominant and that Jill complements him which is very cool.
It is good to see people who know where they are at though.
Jill!!! i loved your bonus answer!!
As always the answers here are sexy! even when most of them say NO!
Love how we feel the same about some of the answers!!
way to go!!
Happy TMI!!!
kisses to both!!
Aluv
* i wear Depends, but i have a doctor’s note, i don’t have to do P.E. anymore!
* one way to throw a wrench in the yes/no works is to use a multi-sided Dungeons and Dragons die
* operatic orgasms are bigger than regular orgasms…
There seems to be a general view that folk don’t want to be humiliated – but of course one person’s humiliation is another’s ok.
Love the accompanying pictures.
Happy TMI x
I think Jack and I had identical answers for number 4.
Jill, your family members never need to know!
Jack! I got you a Twilight tee for your birthday.
Mmm. You…naturally dominant = YUM
Could I lie between you and Jill and you both take turns talking dirty to me and playing with me?
—————–
@Jill
2. “…and it turns me on when Jack tells me exactly what he wants me to wear.”
I agree! Well not Jack but a lover.
6. I love how you two relate to each other…so sexy.
Happy TMI Tuesday,
-H
Pleasure Principle
http://pleasure-principle-hedone.blogspot.com