It’s a lovely spring day here in the mid-atlantic region of the U.S. How’s your weather? What season is it? Oh, and let’s do TMI Tuesday. ?
Sexy it is!
Jack’s Answers
1. What question about sex do you find hard to ask your partner?
I don’t really know what to say here. I’ve never had to stifle the urge to ask if I was enough for my partner physically; as a non-monogamous person it ultimately doesn’t matter. I don’t have trouble asking if my partner has climaxed if the answer is ambiguous. I tend to have no problem asking for something sexual that I want to do, and as anyone who’s slept with me can attest, I probably ask if the other person is okay so often it’s annoying. I suppose I don’t typically ask my partner about their sexual past, but that’s less due to difficulty or any sort of psychological block, and more about an unwillingness to pry into things that aren’t my business. In the interest of being done with the question, though, I’m going to go with that.
2. What question about sex do you find hard to ask anyone?
“What position were you conceived in?” In addition to finding it distasteful, especially when asked by a random stranger at a Starbucks, most people just plain don’t know.
3. Sexually, what are your favorite things to do?
There isn’t much I don’t like, though if I have to narrow it down to, say, four, I’d go with finding my partner’s G-spot, ideally while fingering, licking, and/or sucking her clit; making out, ideally while caressing my partner’s body and being caressed simultaneously, or for that matter undressing her; receiving oral sex, because who doesn’t like the amazing combination of receiving sexual stimulation while not moving at all?; and, uh…what the hell. I’ll go with penetrative sex for number four.
4. Name 3 things that most excite your imagination when you imagine doing them?
The first is watching a woman masturbate. I find that this specifically sparks my imagination because chances are that if I’ve interacted with a woman, I’ve probably wondered how she gets herself off. I’ve imagined how she looks naked, what techniques or toys she might use, and what she looks and sounds like when she climaxes. So the thought of actually getting to watch is unbelievably exciting for me. The second is finding my partner’s G-spot, because I love giving pleasure, and it invariably provokes an amazing physical response. The third is probably some manner of group sex – typically a threesome or foursome – because I like indulging in both voyeurism and exhibitionism while having sex.
5. In how many countries have you had sexual relations?
Just two. Ninety-nine percent (or more) of the sex I’ve had has occurred in the United States, as that is where I’ve spent the vast majority of my life. I also had sex a lot of sex with Jill in Ireland while on vacation there in the early days of our dating relationship. And if one wishes to be technical, we had sex on a cruise ship that was docked in a Canadian port, but I’m not certain that counts.
Bonus: Describe your ideal sex partner.
Honestly, just about any woman who’s willing to engage me sexually is my ideal partner. Physically I don’t have a type; over the years my girlfriends and lovers have run the proverbial gamut of size, shape, ethnicity, and characteristics. All have been very attractive and sexy. So if I have to describe the ideal, she would possess certain qualities that transcend the physical. She’d have to have an open mind, be eager to please and be pleased, and be proactive in bed (or wherever we happen to be getting off together). In other words, she should take an active interest in her own pleasure (and my own), and not simply lie there on the verge of sleep.
Jill’s Answers
1. What question about sex do you find hard to ask your partner?
I don’t really think there is anything I find hard to ask. When I was younger and just beginning to be sexually active I used to find it hard to approach the subject of whether a partner had been tested recently. But I got over that fairly quickly. My health is the most important thing, and it wasn’t difficult to keep it in the forefront of my mind. Today, there really isn’t anything I’m shy about asking. I find that sharing openly ensures the experience is best for both of us (or however many people are present).
2. What question about sex do you find hard to ask anyone?
Again, I can’t think of anything I find it hard to ask or talk about. I’m always very willing to share, and while I may not initiate sex talk with someone who I’m not certain is receptive to it, if the other person starts it, I’ll ask anything: Favorite position, spit or swallow, opinion of anal sex, etc.
3. Sexually, what are your favorite things to do?
I love the intimacy leading up to sex. The touching, the kissing, the longing looks, the exploration, and the closeness are all aspects of foreplay that excite me endlessly. After that, I really love oral sex, both giving and receiving. As for penetration, I love riding as I really enjoy the feeling of fullness that I get in that position. In missionary, I am always excited by the feel of my lover’s weight on my body. When being fucked from behind, there is something very enticing about being bent over and taken, often while his hands grip my ass or my hips, or pull my hair. Lastly, I love experiencing afterglow while entwined with the other person.
4. Name 3 things that most excite your imagination when you imagine doing them?
The first is exploring my lover’s body. I enjoy touching, licking, kissing, and sucking. There is so much pleasure to be had! The second is him kissing my neck. I can vividly imagine feeling his breath right before his lips touch my skin. The third is cunnilingus. The thought of my lover’s mouth and tongue driving me wild has me very wet.
5. In how many countries have you had sexual relations?
Only two, but I am always looking to add to that number.
Bonus: Describe your ideal sex partner.
My ideal sexual partner is a caring lover who is able to read my body and play it like a piano. A man who wants to excite my mind as well as my body. He would ideally be eager to enjoy all of me, to engage in slow, tender lovemaking as well as furious, energetic fucking. He must enjoy being touched, savored, and pleasured, cuddling and kissing me. He would seem to know what I want and need, both physically and emotionally, even before I do. With him, I would feel truly connected and engaged.
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
to Jack ~ I loved it when you said “I don’t have trouble asking if my partner has climaxed if the answer is ambiguous”. I know some women object to being asked (or is that my wife) but dammit if you can’t tell for sure 100% isn’t it polite to ask? If you care about the other person it’s a no brainer, surely?
I’m no lawyer but I’ve watched enough TV to know that under International Law having sex while on a cruise ship docked in port DOES mean you had sex in Canada. So you can up your International Sex tally to 3!
to Jill ~ loved your answers to Q3 & Q4. You (in the generic sense, I’m not hitting on you) represent my ideal lover.
Jack, I can definitely see how asking someone what position they were conceived in would be a tad awkward. Jill, you and I have number four very much in common.