It may be time to buy a Lelo Soraya.

See who else is being sinful at Molly’s Daily Kiss!

-Jill

This is our five-hundredth post.  We considered doing something enormous, something epic, to commemorate the milestone.  There are a few reasons why we ultimately did not.

For one thing, we couldn’t rent a hall big enough to accommodate the party we were hoping to throw.  Even if one had been available, our funds are grossly insufficient to fly each and every one of you out to party with us.  So that was out.

We thought about posting some sort of picture that would reflect our new post-count; we did one such post when we hit four hundred, and now drawing “500” on Jill’s ass with a Sharpie seems like the worst kind of redundancy.  So we didn’t do that.

We wanted to get all stat-crazy and include a breakdown of the number of times we’ve posted different memes and such over the last five hundred posts, i.e. forty-two TMI Tuesdays, sixteen HNTs, twenty-nine Retro HNTs, twenty-four Sinful Sundays, etc.  That sounded like a lot of work, and while we’re far from lazy we’ve also written and scheduled eighteen posts this week, some of which have already been published, and some of which will be published over the next couple weeks while we’re away on vacation.  So actually sitting down and counting posts seemed like an asinine thing to do.  Contrary to popular belief, we do occasionally enjoy sleeping.

We considered linking to our favorite posts of the last three-plus years, but this sounded almost as labor-intensive as the previous idea.  At any rate, how would we even go about determining our favorite posts?  And just how many posts would we be able to choose?  One favorite?  Impossible.  Ten favorites?  Fifty?  I’m certain that narrowing five hundred posts down to fifty would also be difficult, though doable.  But when you’re narrowing anything down to one-tenth of the whole, why bother?  At that point we might as well just tell visitors to pick a random post from the archives and enjoy.

No, we ultimately decided to do none of these things.  Instead, this is just a quick acknowledgement.  It’s not much to look at, is it?  Not what you’d expect for half a thousand.  Just a crappy stock graphic at the top.  Kind of lame, really.  We’re almost ashamed that we even bothered.  Why call attention to such a grand milestone if you’re going to do it so half-assed?  Oh well.  Hopefully posts number 501 will be more engrossing.

To all those who have supported us on this journey, we thank you sincerely.  Whether you’ve posted a comment, shared your thoughts with us on Twitter or via e-mail, or even just contributed to the sometimes prodigious page view count on our posts, we want you to know that we might not have made it this far without you.  While we blog primarily for our own reasons, independent of the community aspect of blogging, we greatly appreciate your taking the time to stop by.  We hope you’ll stick around, because there’s plenty more to come.

Oh, what the hell.  Here’s a picture.

In 2010, we posted fifty-two consecutive weeks of pictures at OHNT.  We’re posting them on our blog, one per week.  They can be found here, along with background information and all the comments they received.

Jack’s Answers

1. Have you ever shared sleeping accommodations with someone of the opposite sex without anything steamy happening?
This is the third time we’ve answered this question.  While we missed it in 2010, we answered it in 2009, along with the rest of this week’s questions; and again in March of this year when it was included in a “best-of” TMI Tuesday questions list.  Rather than going off on a snarky rant about how Sunday Stealing used to be the repetitive meme, I think I’ll skip this question, as nothing has changed in the last four months.

2. Have you ever streaked, flashed, or otherwise partially or totally exposed yourself in public before (or after) an informal, unofficial gathering of people?
In 2009, I made reference to an incident in which I was hot tubbing with a small group of friends, and found myself without a towel, or my swimming trunks.  When it came time to get out of the hot tub, rather than worry about my lack of coverage, I just got out and hunted down a towel.  Since 2009, I’ve been partially or totally naked at a sex club, and on a beach on Christmas Eve.

3. Have you had dates with multiple people in the same weekend (or consecutive nights or the same night) while not all of your dates were aware of your actions?
My 2009 answer was:

Yes. In my early twenties I would occasionally go out with one person on Friday night and a different person on Saturday night. Didn’t happen every week, by any means; I was never that kind of guy. But that handful of times, I felt like a pimp.

In 2012, that’s still true.  I haven’t dated since 2009.

4. What is the most “romantic” you have ever gotten in a movie theater?

In 2009, I stated that the farthest things had ever gone in a movie theater was manual stimulation.  What better venue for an illicit handjob than a darkened movie theater.  I’ve also done some fingering in a movie theater, though hitherto never to Jill.  And if it’s not Jill, what’s the point?  However, as depicted in a recent Wicked Wednesday post, several months after the original answer was posted I went quite a bit farther than I ever had.  Jill gave me head (not to climax), and I fingered her (to climax).  

5. Have you ever had sex when you knew a non-participating adult was watching?

In 2009, I said, “Oh yeah! In fact, earlier this summer Jill and I performed for a male friend of ours, after about two years of him beating around the bush about it.”  While the incident described in my original answer made for a pretty exciting experience, I’ve always been more interested in having a woman watch than a guy, presumably because I’m attracted to women.  However, since 2009 we’ve been watched by our friend M, although strictly speaking she wasn’t exactly a non-participant; she just wasn’t doing anything with us right at that moment.  We’ve also had same-room sex with another couple.  I’m not sure if this counts, as while the other couple wasn’t participating with us, they were technically still participating.

Jill’s Answers

1. Have you ever shared sleeping accommodations with someone of the opposite sex without anything steamy happening?

My original answer, which I reaffirmed in March, still holds true.  I have slept in the same bed as a member of the opposite sex without anything out of the ordinary occurring, though not lately.

2. Have you ever streaked, flashed, or otherwise partially or totally exposed yourself in public before (or after) an informal, unofficial gathering of people?

Jack says that my new answer to this question earns me the “Most Changed” award.  In 2009 I said, “although I fantasize about attending sex clubs, having sex in public, and other scenarios of this type, in reality I have self-esteem issues which inhibit me from prancing around naked. Don’t get me wrong – I wish I didn’t have these inhibitions.”  Since then, I have attended a sex club where I partially exposed myself and had sex with Jack in front of a crowd.  I have also been completely naked on a clothing optional beach.

3. Have you had dates with multiple people in the same weekend (or consecutive nights or the same night) while not all of your dates were aware of your actions?

My 2009 answer was, “I’m pretty sure I never did this. In the past I only dated one guy at a time.”  It’s still true.  If we ever start dating other people again, I’ll be sure to adjust my answer.

4. What is the most “romantic” you have ever gotten in a movie theater?

I said in 2009 that while I’d done my share of fooling around in a car at a drive-in, I hadn’t done anything too daring in a movie theater.  “Of the men I have been involved with, Jack is probably the only one who would’ve been inclined to go beyond making out at a movie theater, and he’s probably too afraid of arrest to try it now.”  Turns out I was wrong!  When I was pregnant with our daughter, I gave Jack a blowjob (and he fingered my pussy) in an otherwise empty theater.  I don’t know if we were thinking of it as our “last hurrah” before the responsibilities of parenthood began, but it was really hot, and the risk of being caught in the act provided a huge thrill.  This incident is the basis for a recent Wicked Wednesday post.

5. Have you ever had sex when you knew a non-participating adult was watching?

As I said the first time, I once fooled around with a guy on the beach.  We didn’t actually have penetrative sex, but we were for all intents and purposes naked.  People were walking by, and though I don’t remember for certain, I can’t imagine that a few passersby didn’t stop to gawk at us.  Also, I once had sex with a guy I was dating while his roommate watched.  I’m not sure if he qualifies as “non-participating” since he was masturbating.

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

If you follow our Twitter accounts, you may have noticed from our tweets that we were on vacation last week.  We didn’t go anywhere exotic or out of the ordinary, but we had fun swimming, lying on a beach in the sun, roasting marshmallows, relaxing, and having lots of sex.

You may not have realized it, but we took a week off of blogging as well.  All of our posts from Sunday, June 24th until Thursday, June 28th were written and scheduled for publication well in advance.  We auto-post as much as possible during the week, in some cases just an hour or two before the typical post’s midnight publication time, but in this case it was out of necessity as we were unsure as to whether or not we’d have an internet connection while on our trip.  As it turns out, we had wi-fi most of the time, and that allowed us to keep up with the blogs we follow as well as monitor and approve comments on our own blog.

It was wonderful to have so many of our posts written, auto-posted, and more or less out of mind so far in advance.  This would have been impossible without the cooperation of meme-keepers like Hedone and sub_Rebel, who gave us an early look at the week’s TMI Tuesday questions and Wicked Wednesday prompt, respectively.  In getting the week’s blogging out of the way early, we were able to concentrate on relaxing, without spending the a significant amount of each day hunched over a laptop.  Generally, blog-related activity was limited to an hour or so in the evenings or at night just before bed, wherein we’d comment blogs, tweet links to our just-published posts, or submit links to meme sites like Sinful Sunday and The Naughty Hangout.

As our vacation wound down, it occurred to me that it would be an enormous relief to be able to regularly autopost the entirety, or at least the majority, of a week’s blog posts in advance.  We have done this to an extent with our Retro HNT posts, as they require almost no creativity, just an already-taken photo and some copied-and-pasted boilerplate.  In fact, that the entirety of our Retro HNT pictures aren’t already auto-posted is due to my own laziness and lack of interest in repetition than any technical limitation.

In reality, however, this is pretty much impossible.  Even were we to divide up the blogging responsibilities equally, there is no way we could devote the necessary time.  It’s unlikely now that Jill is on summer break, so there’s no chance of this happening during the school year when the day-to-day child-rearing is done solely by yours truly.  At any rate, even if we had sufficient time and energy to spend writing all of a given week’s blog posts in one day, we’d much rather spend that time doing fun things that do not involve a laptop – or even our phones.  It’s summertime, and taking our baby to the park, walking through the icy surf on one of many local beaches, barbecuing, going to the movies, and having lots of sex all trump blogging.  Sorry, but it’s true.

Case in point:  A couple days before we left on last week’s trip, while packing, shopping, and generally maintaining the harmony in our household, we also managed to write, edit, format, and auto-publish seven different posts.  This proved a daunting task, and while we enjoyed the sense of accomplishment we felt as we completed each one, it was pretty stressful.

Make no mistake, it wasn’t a chore, nor was the stress level unpleasant.  But the assumption that we wouldn’t be able to blog day-by-day was a strong motivator; I question whether we’d want to set aside a possibly five- or six-hour period on a Sunday or a Monday for the purpose of completing all or most of the week’s blogging if we knew we’d be able to write and post our stuff the night before.  It might be worth it to do so; it’s simply not feasible.

This brings me to the point of this post.  Later this month, we will be away from home for approximately two weeks.  Once again, we have reason to believe that we will have little or no internet access on the road; for all I know we won’t even have network access on our phones.  Therefore, we will try to write and schedule as many posts in advance as we possibly can.

Given our regular weekly blogging schedule, we’re talking anywhere from nineteen to twenty-two posts, depending on whether or not we blog on Saturdays.  Nine of these are photo posts, including two Retro HNTs which are so effortless that they practically post themselves.  Anywhere from ten to thirteen (again, Saturdays) are more in-depth written posts.  However, six of these posts – two each of TMI Tuesday, Wicked Wednesday, and Flash Fiction Friday – are dependent upon our knowing a prompt, or in the case of TMI Tuesday, a list of questions.

Because of this, in the worst-case scenario in which we are completely off the grid, without internet access of any kind, we won’t be able to take part in these posts.  We imagine that such a scenario is unlikely; even the most obscure backwater town has a Starbucks or at least a public library that features wi-fi.  Or at least, we hope so.

There’s no need to worry that blogging will cease altogether during our two weeks away from home and (presumably) the internet.  We will do our best to have regular content scheduled to publish on a daily or near-daily basis before we leave.  Though we may be forced to skip an occasional day or two, we imagine that our absence will be no more than that.

That sounds great, Jack, you may be saying.  How can I help?  The answer is simple.  Stop by our Formspring page and ask us a question or two.  Our inbox is close to empty, and ensuring that it stays filled to capacity means that we will have a Formspring Friday post up each week.  Not interested in going to the Formspring page?  Too lazy to click a link?  You can also drop questions into the Formspring widget on the right-hand side of this blog and submit them that way.  Don’t see it?  You may have to scroll up.

In conclusion, the next few days will be quite busy around the Jack and Jill household as we try to cram as much advance blogging into that time as possible, while not letting the amount of non-blogging summertime fun (and sex, for that matter) suffer as a result.