Formspring Friday: Stress Relief

Your spouse comes home from a very stressful day, how do you help him/her relax?
Jack’s Answer
The first thing I’d do is let Jill hang out with the baby for an hour or so.  Since she is away from the baby all day, a little quality time spent bonding would be an essential stress reliever for her.  After they’d read some stories and played for awhile, I would probably put the baby in her room with the gate up and plenty to keep her occupied.  I’d pour Jill a glass of wine – and one for myself as well, naturally – and let her put her feet up.  Then I’d give her a foot massage while she watched something on television or got caught up with blogs and Twitter on her phone.
The foot massage would likely progress to a full-body massage, after which we’d turn off the television (if it was on) and relax together on the couch for a bit.  Eventually I’d bring the baby out into the living room (unless she was having fun by herself, in which case I’d leave her to it) and prepare dinner while Jill enjoyed another glass of wine.  We’d eat dinner, enjoy some light conversation, and then Jill would relax on the couch with the baby until she was ready for bed.  
Once the baby was down for the night, I’d draw a warm bath for Jill.  I’d light some candles and let her soak.  I’d also wash her hair, as that’s one of the most relaxing – and simultaneously arousing – things she can imagine.  I’d rinse her hair and dry her off, then lay her down on clean sheets and kiss and touch her all over.  My own satisfaction is inconsequential; while Jill would insist that I get off, it would certainly not be my focus.  And by the time she fell asleep, all remnants of the day’s stress would be gone.
Jill’s Answer
I’d start by making Jack a drink, most likely a glass of Irish whiskey neat.  While he enjoyed his drink, I would take the baby out for awhile, probably to the park or the library, or else just to run errands with me.  Since Jack is with the baby all day and she doesn’t always nap, a little bit of alone time would be an essential stress reliever for him.  While the baby and I were gone Jack could relax, take a nap, do some writing, or maybe just be alone with his thoughts and enjoy the silence.  
Hopefully when we returned home after an hour or an hour and a half, Jack would be well-rested and far less stressed than he was before.  But just in case he wasn’t I’d take the baby into the kitchen with me while I prepared a delicious dinner, and she could read or play quietly, or even help me cook by getting the ingredients I need out of the refrigerator or cabinet.  We’d all sit down to dinner together and after clearing the table and washing the dishes, I’d put the baby to bed.  
Once she was asleep I’d take off all of Jack’s clothes and we’d enjoy a hot, steamy shower together.  After getting him clean I’d lay him down on our bed and give him the most incredible, relaxing full-body massage.  Needless to say, sex would be occurring immediately after the massage.  (That’s what you were waiting for the whole time, wasn’t it?)  The specifics aren’t set in stone.  It could be oral, vaginal, anal, or any combination of the three.  But whatever happened, Jack would fall asleep completely satisfied and totally relaxed, and hopefully he’d wake up to a much less stressful day.

If you want to ask us anything, drop us a line on Formspring, or use the handy Formspring widget on the right-hand side of our blog.  We like sexy questions!  To see who else participated this week, visit Twitter and search for #FormspringFriday!

Flash Fiction Friday: Bridal Shower

Carla’s feet rested against Maggie’s hips as she explored beneath the beaded silk.  Maggie pushed the dress up, letting it bunch at Carla’s waist as her tongue lapped and licked with abandon.  The intensity was too much, and she soaked Maggie’s face as orgasm overcame her.

Their bodies pressing together, they kissed hard, passionately, as though it were simultaneously the first time and the last.

They lay together in dreamy silence.  Maggie spoke:  “I was sorry that I didn’t get an invitation.” She savored Carla’s taste on her lips, savored the memories that accompanied it.

Carla’s supple breasts rose and fell urgently as she caught her breath.  “He doesn’t know about this.  About any of it.”

“You could have introduced me as your old college roommate.”  Maggie’s expression indicated half-seriousness, though it was practically the truth.  During college, they spent as much time in the other’s dorm as they did in their own.

More silence.  Maggie expected more of a reaction from her belated wedding present.  She got up, found her panties, and slipped them on.

“Well, glad I got to see you in the dress, anyway.” (187/187)

Behind the Scenes

For the first time in four weeks, a new Flash Fiction Friday prompt has been issued, this one courtesy of Ram the Sunlover.  In addition to the 187-word limit, participants were required to include the word “belated”.  I found the prompt photo fairly inspiring, though it was Jill and not myself who looked at the photo and immediately said, “That’s her belated wedding present.”

My first draft was a mere ninety words long.  Though it was very lean and far less detailed than the final draft, this initial take told the complete story.  I actually prefer it when my first draft is drastically under-budget, as it gives me some breathing room and allows me to flesh out aspects of the story that I initially could not.  I padded the story with some florid description, though in my opinion what was added doesn’t seem like fluff.

True to form, I forgot to include the required word, and after writing what was to be the final draft I spent twenty minutes attempting to incorporate mention of the “belated wedding present”.  It was difficult to determine the ideal place for said mention; I wanted Maggie to be the one to use that expression, either in her dialogue or in her inner monologue, and for some reason I had trouble making it sound natural.  Eventually I tacked on the reference in the penultimate paragraph, but I worry that it sounds stilted.

Deleted Scenes

Thanks in part to the larger-than-expected word allotment, there was nothing that had to be trimmed.  Quite the opposite; as stated above, I added a bit of prose to pad the story.  I also considered ending the story with Maggie telling Carla, “Maybe you should tell him.”  This would have implied that she was open to a polyamorous relationship with Carla and her new groom, or at the very least a threesome.

Additionally, I considered the title “Wedding Present”, but ultimately decided that it was a little too on-the-nose.  Though perhaps more of an obscure reference, “Bridal Shower” is suitably sexy, as it refers directly to Carla’s orgasmic emission.

Soundtrack

I like the sensual sound of “The Look of Love”, especially Dusty Springfield’s 1967 original.  However, Isaac Hayes’ cover is bold and brassy and would work as well.  Additionally, Sade’s “No Ordinary Love” fits well; the lyrics seem to fit Maggie’s perspective of a lover who has given her all and perhaps feels abandoned.

Wicked Wednesday: At the Movies

I sent her an e-mail letting her know that I was on my way.  She might not have seen a text message until she was leaving work to come home, but I knew she’d get my e-mail right away.

She replied immediately.  She was excited.  So was I.  We hadn’t seen each other in days, and while every instinct we possessed dictated that we immediately find a quiet place to indulve the unbridled passion we both felt, we wanted to enjoy a night out.  Soon, our opportunities to do so would be limited.

We found ourselves at a nearby movie theater.  The movie we saw is unimportant, and long since forgotten.  What is important, however, is the fact that we were the only ones there.  We arrived at an empty auditorium, and spent the twenty minutes before showtime watching the entrance with much greater attention than the screen.

We had naughtiness on our minds.  Why not?  We always do.  The thought of a little pre-show hanky panky was appealing, but we were certain that the moment things began to happen, the theater would fill with popcorn-munching, soda-slurping moviegoers who would quickly ruin our fun.

It never happened.  The lights dimmed, the trailers played, and the movie started, all without so much as an incursion from another human being.  We were well into the first act when it became clear that we had the theater to ourselves, and that there was no ignoring our desperate physical need.

Jill opened my jeans and fished out my cock, watching it rise to full size in her grasp.  As she pumped her fist up and down along its length, it occurred to me that the school where she worked was less than a mile away.  Granted, we were alone in the theater.  But what if we were wrong?  If we only thought we were alone, and we really weren’t, there would be repercussions.

These thoughts left my head as Jill leaned close and I felt her lips envelop me.  Her mouth was warm, her tongue damp.  She slowly slid down, swallowing me to my base.  She lingered there for one exquisite moment, and when she came up for air she swapped mouth for hand and resumed pumping.

My attention had already turned away from the movie, moreso when Jill got out of her seat and knelt in front of me.  Rather than squinting through the shadows to watch her head bob up and down, I tried to focus on the movie.  It was too late; I wasn’t into it anymore.  Instead I concentrated on how good my wife’s mouth felt on me, certain it wouldn’t be long before I was cumming down her throat.

When something near the theater entrance caught my eye, I tensed up.  Jill could sense it, and she stopped what she was doing.  She looked up, her eyes meeting mine in the darkness.  She didn’t speak.

“Get up,” I said.  “Hurry.  Sit back down.”  She did, and as I put my still-throbbing cock back into my pants and buckled my belt, I could see that she was staring at the door where I’d seen whatever it was that had made me tense up.

“Did someone come in?” she asked, her voice tiny, barely a whisper.

“I don’t think so,” I said.  She moved to open my jeans again, and I dissuaded her.  I pulled up her skirt, somehow unsurprised by her lack of panties.  She was wet, her arousal a welcoming scent. My fingers parted her lips, holding her open as my thumb found its way to her clit.  As I stroked her, my fingers slipped inside, finding a molten reservoir of lust.

My fingers reached her G-spot as my thumb circled her clit.  Jill threw back her head, gasping with pleasure.  She bit her lip to keep from crying out as I pressed into that familiar mass of flesh, the one that had all too often unlocked the most intense orgasms imaginable.  Her fingers dug into the armrests on her seat, squeezing as though her life hung in the balance.

When she came, when the torrent of her essence came gushing forth, I was surprised, if only because she had managed to keep fairly silent.  She drenched not only my forearm, but also quite a bit of her skirt as well.  I couldn’t help but muse that if anyone had entered the theater, we’d put on a much better show than whatever was playing on the screen.

“You want to…”, Jill began when she could speak once again.  I thought she was going to ask if I wanted her to finish what she’d begun with me.  She started over:  “You want to switch seats?”  We moved to the seats directly in front of us, and continued to watch the movie as best we could.  It wasn’t easy.  Our minds were on something much different.

As for whether or not anyone had walked in, we’re pretty sure no one had, but it doesn’t matter.  In the more than two years since this incident occurred, nothing ever came of it.

This week’s prompt: …I sent him (her) an e-mail…

Wicked Wednesday

TMI Tuesday: June 19, 2012 – You say it’s your birthday

(Birthday TMI questions suggested by Heelsnstocking)
1. What star sign are you?
I’m a Leo.  Leos are thought to be confident, ambitious, loyal, and generous.  This describes me pretty accurately.  However, Leos are also described as stubborn, pretentious, and vain.  Sadly, this is also an accurate description of me.
2. Do you believe in horoscopes?
No, not really.  Accordingly, I must chalk up everything I said in my answer to question #1 to coincidence.  I have often pretended to believe, or at least to care, especially in my single days when some chick might have slept with me if I kept a straight face while she talked about which house Jupiter was in.
3. When is your birthday?
Late summer.

One of many ways in which my birthday is like a back-to-school sale.
4. What’s the worst birthday gift a partner has given you?
You know, I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a bad birthday gift from a partner.  If I have, nothing comes to mind.  I think I’ve always been the sort who is grateful that someone thought of me, especially if we’re talking about a relatively new relationship, the stage in which the other person is still getting accustomed to my somewhat eclectic tastes.  Under those circumstances I’ve probably made my likes and dislikes known, but I’m certainly not going to react with distaste to a present that may have been purchased or made with the best of intentions but which fell a bit short of the mark.  
5. Are you organised when it comes to other people’s birthdays?
Not even slightly.  Sure, I have some important birthdays committed to memory, notably Jill’s, my parents’, and certain friends’.  With other people I might know what week their birthdays are but not the specific date.  But with the vast majority of my friends and family, if no Facebook reminder comes through, I’ll probably miss it.
6. How do you normally celebrate your birthday?
I usually get naked and put on a fez.  Then I light up my favorite briar pipe, and sit in a comfortable chair while listening to Mozart’s Requiem and contemplating the futility of existence, my own dwindling time left on earth, or some combination of the two.  Or if that’s too honest for you, I like to celebrate with family and friends, usually with good food and drink.  

Sometimes there’s a stripper.
7. If you could be one age again what would it be? Why?
I don’t know how to answer this one.  If I say I would like to relive my early twenties, a time of tremendous freedom and fun, it sounds like I am not happy with my relationship with Jill as we hadn’t met until I was much older.  If I say that I would like to relive one of the early years of our relationship, say when I was twenty-eight or twenty-nine, an almost-as-carefree time before we were married, someone might misconstrue that as an insult toward my daughter.  You know what?  I love my life right now.  Ask me this question again in a few years and I’ll say thirty-five.
8. What would be your ideal birthday treat?
When I was younger, my birthday brought with it much spectacle and fanfare, but as I get older – and moreso now that I’m a Dad – I see that my birthday is just another day.  Make no mistake, I don’t have issues with birthdays because I’m afraid of aging.  But when my birthday arrives the end of summer isn’t far behind.  While this fact never escaped my mind when I would blow out my candles as a child, I used to really look forward to my birthday as a “last hurrah” before returning to school.  Of late, however, Jill’s school year has begun on or immediately following my birthday.  With the start of her school year comes my return to full-time stay-at-home Dad duties.  So the ideal treat for me would be to have a little more time between my birthday and the end of my summer vacation.

Not what I meant, smart-ass.
Bonus:  Tell us your best birthday memory?
For my birthday in 2010, we had a threesome with another woman.  It was a phenomenal experience for many reasons, not the least of which is the fact that I’d been wanting to experience such a thing for decades.  It was infinitely more fulfilling with my wife and best friend than it likely would have been with someone I was dating casually or cared less about than I do Jill.  But perhaps more importantly, the fact that Jill arranged the threesome without my knowledge proved not only that she was willing to go to any lengths to ensure my birthday was a memorable one, but also that she trusted me implicitly, and didn’t view my interactions with another woman as a threat to our relationship.  I learned a lot about my wife that night.  Additionally the threesome occurred at my in-laws’ house while no one was there.  That in and of itself may have made it extra dirty.  It bears noting that I also got a threesome for my birthday in 2011, which was perhaps even more memorable because the three of us went out to dinner beforehand, and spent the entire meal shamelessly flirting.  The level of sexual tension was amped up to eleven.  Three guesses what I want for my birthday this year…
You guessed wrong.
Bonus, Bonus:  May we see you in your birthday suit? (post a photo)
Listen to you, asking politely!  With manners like these, I imagine you can have anything you want.
Originally posted April 9, 2012.

Jill’s Answers

1. What star sign are you?
I’m a virgo.  Jack thinks this is funny because Virgo is symbolized by the virgin maiden, and its glyph is an “M” combined with crossed legs.  There may have been a time when I was a prim and proper virgin, but it’s been awhile.

I always thought it was an “M” combined with a fish.
2. Do you believe in horoscopes?
Only when they say something good is going to happen to me.  I refuse to give any credence to a horoscope that predicts bad things.  Truthfully, I never really read them.  There was a time when I’d see my horoscope in the back of a Cosmopolitan magazine and read it, but I never deliberately sought it out.  On the other hand, when we visit Disneyland I make a point of putting twenty-five cents in the fortune telling machine at the Penny Arcade on Main Street, U.S.A.  (Ironic that a machine in a penny arcade costs a quarter to operate, but there you have it.)

Despite Jack’s claims, putting a dollar in the machine won’t make her pole-dance.
3. When is your birthday?
I’m a bit offended by this!  If you can’t remember something as important as my birthday, then I’m not going to tell you.  Seriously, people I hadn’t gone out with or even spoken to in six to eight months have remembered to call or text me on my birthday because I made clear how important it was to me when we were dating.  Actually, now that I think of it that was kind of creepy, especially since I had usually moved on to a new guy by that point.
4. What’s the worst birthday gift a partner has given you?
I can’t think of one.  I don’t have any stories about someone buying me a bowling ball with “Homer” on it.  And I’ve never had a boyfriend buy me a Norelco beard trimmer with his name on it.  I guess the closest I’ve ever come to a bad birthday gift was the time my boyfriend was supposed to take me out on my birthday.  I waited all night for him to call, and finally I broke down and called him and left a voicemail.  He finally called me the next morning and said he was called in to work the night before.  He just didn’t bother to tell me.  I broke up with him soon after.
Still, it’s not the worst faux pas a boyfriend can commit.

5. Are you organised when it comes to other people’s birthdays?
When it comes to Jack and our daughter, I am very organized.  Usually their birthdays involve planning parties or other elaborate activities.  With everyone else’s birthdays, meaning my extended family and my close friends, I know when their birthdays are, but I usually find myself buying their gifts that day.  In some cases if I don’t see the individual on his or her actual birthday, I might buy the gift weeks later.

6. How do you normally celebrate your birthday?

Jack usually takes me out to dinner, while the baby stays with a sitter.  I’ve also gone out to dinner with my family and friends.  It varies.  Last year, for example, for my fortieth birthday, Jack threw me an enormous surprise party and invited all of my nearest and dearest.  It was a fabulous time.

7. If you could be one age again what would it be? Why?

I choose age thirty-eight.  That’s when I was pregnant with our beautiful daughter.  It was a wonderful experience and a very fun year.  Even though I was forced to spend most of that time living a couple hours away from Jack and the home we shared, we made the most of the time we had together, and really appreciated every minute.  Plus, the anticipation of seeing and holding my baby was tremendous.  I’ve never felt so close to another human being in my entire life, and knowing that she was completely reliant on me, and that I was responsible for her, means more to me now than I can ever express.  I loved watching her development, talking to her, singing to her, and feeling her move and kick inside me.  Once she was born, the experience of bonding with her was very special to me.  Jack and I became even closer than we were before.

Well yeah, but that wasn’t what I meant.

8. What would be your ideal birthday treat?
I’d love a trip to Europe or a Mediterranean cruise.  But spending time with the people I love would be more than enough.

Bonus:  Tell us your best birthday memory?
The surprise birthday party Jack threw for me last year was wonderful!  It was a beautiful day, most of my loved ones were there, and I was so touched by the amount of hard work that Jack put into it.  Plus, I was very impressed that he managed to keep it a secret.  I know how difficult it was for him to coordinate everything perfectly, and he pulled it off.  What a great guy!

Bonus, Bonus:  May we see you in your birthday suit? (post a photo)
Like you haven’t seen me in my birthday suit many times already.

Originally posted February 26, 2012

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Edited Tuesday, June 19, 2012 at 6:17 PM to include Jill’s somehow-omitted answer to #5.

A Healthy Attitude About Masturbation Is Worth More Than You Know

I have a ridiculous libido.  I tend to get aroused the way a thirteen-year-old boy gets aroused:  Often and by virtually anything, or for that matter by nothing at all.  I could climax nine times a day, whether from masturbation or some manner of partnered sexual activity, and I’d still want a tenth, if not an eleventh as well.

Considering the variety of sexual partners I’ve had, I’m fortunate to be married to a woman who can keep up with me.  We are alike not only with regard to the frequency with which we both want sex, but also with regard to our personal limits and the things that turn us on.  Anyone who’s read our blog for an appreciable amount of time should be aware that Jill and I are a good match.

But that’s not to say that we’re always on the same page.  While perusing SexIs, the online magazine of EdenFantasys, I came across an article by Ava Darke, who says that her lack of satisfaction – through no fault of her partner but rather owing to her frequent physiological need of orgasm – has been responsible for many restless nights.  Ms. Darke confesses to having a difficult time sleeping when orgasm doesn’t occur immediately beforehand.


To some extent, I could relate to this; while I’ve never given much thought to the endorphins produced during orgasm, I am aware of the fact that sometimes – perhaps not every night, but relatively often – I prefer to be lulled to sleep by the good feelings brought about by sexual release.  Such was definitely the case Saturday night when, after having sex with Jill and then taking a shower, I got into bed to find my wife asleep.  Feeling horny once again, I knew I wouldn’t be able to just close my eyes and drift off.  I could have masturbated, but Jill was wearing a short T-shirt that showed off her ass, and even barely illuminated by moonlight the sight of her curves reignited my arousal.  I began to kiss and caress her, she woke up, and before long we were enjoying another round that I knew would provide me the high I so urgently wanted.

I usually don’t handle it that way, however.  If Jill and I don’t go to bed at the same time, and I happen to find her sleeping soundly when I come in, I usually just leave her be.  Since becoming parents, restful sleep is rare and precious.  If the baby has acquiesced to Jill’s efforts to put her to bed, and Jill is lucky enough to also be asleep, I’m not going to bother her.  Even though the next morning she might admonish me, might tell me that she’s sorry she missed out, might remind me that I am always welcome to wake her for sex, there is a good chance that I’ll just masturbate.  It’s quick, it’s easy, it satisfies my want of orgasm, and perhaps most important of all, it doesn’t require that I wake her.

Make no mistake, I don’t carry any sort of shame or embarrassment over masturbating in front of Jill.  I’m an unabashed masturbator; I’ll do it in front of pretty much anyone who cares to watch, with the understanding that it’s unlikely to be the greatest show on earth.  Jill enjoys watching; her healthy attitude about sexuality does not require me to hide my self-pleasure, or feel guilty about wanting more orgasms than I probably have time for.

Ms. Darke states that it was her own insecurity, and not any sort of indication that he would be unwilling to watch, that prevented her from masturbating in the presence of her husband.  When she finally initiated a dialogue on the subject, he told her that he would be happy to watch her masturbate.  I realize that there are some individuals who suffer from insecurity so debilitating that watching a partner get off solo would be problematic.  However, I suspect that the overwhelming majority of Americans, at least, would find such a spectacle highly arousing.  I know that I certainly do.

There have been many nights when the proverbial shoe was on the other foot, and I woke to a familiar buzzing sound and found Jill spending quality time with one of her vibrators.  At an earlier stage of our relationship I might have worried that perhaps she waited until I was asleep because she wasn’t comfortable with me watching, or because she was afraid that I would see her self-pleasure as a threat.  But she quickly dissuaded my fears, and now on the occasion that I wake to Jill getting herself off I realize that she, like me, just wants a quick orgasm.  Sometimes I quickly close my eyes and give her some time to herself; after all, if she didn’t wake me, she must have just wanted to have an orgasm and get to sleep.  Other times, though, I offer her some assistance.

My opinions on sex and sexual health are widely known.  I believe the world would be a happier, more easygoing place if people were conditioned to view masturbation – and for that matter sex in general – not as shameful but rather as a normal, healthy activity.  It may be somewhat naive to expect the entire world to adopt a positive stance with regard to masturbation, but I don’t think it’s asking too much for one person to be able to bring it up with his or her trusted sexual partner.  That otherwise openly communicative couples are unwilling or unable to discuss masturbation in the context of a committed, loving relationship is troubling.

Without a free-flowing dialogue on the subject, masturbation is doomed to remain something about which people joke, but do not or cannot discuss seriously.  It is clear that societal attitudes have to change.  The problem is that while the public is to some extent willing to consider sweeping reforms with regard to issues like marriage equality – in which personal freedoms are at stake – few see the marginalization of masturbation as the threat that it really is.

-Jack

This post was sponsored by EdenFantasys.

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