“If music be the food of love, play on.” – William Shakespeare (Competition Entry)
You post a LOT of blogs, how do you find the time?? Jack, are you a stay at home dad?
(Submitted by Pagan Princess*)
You’re absolutely right. The main reason why I am such a prolific blogger is because I do not punch a clock. The reality of being a stay-at-home Dad means that it’s relatively easy for me to write a blog post or two each day, usually with enough time left over to read and comment on blogs. Our daughter is two years old, and at times very independent. While my typical day is far from leisurely – stay-at-home parents don’t have the luxury of sick days or even lunch breaks – and the pressure to succeed at raising a child is far greater than the pressure I felt at any of the myriad jobs I held previously, it’s nice to know that I can sit at my laptop for an hour or two and give voice to my feelings on the current sociopolitical climate, relate an account of the hot sex we had the night before, or test out my new Lelo Tor cock ring without worrying that my supervisor is going to fire me for being at my desk with my cock out.
The typical day finds me waking anywhere between five o’clock and eight o’clock in the morning, depending usually on my daughter’s sleep schedule. On the days when I am able to sleep in, it’s because she is also sleeping in, and while I am pleased to have a bit of time to myself (a) I never use that time to shower, get dressed, and eat breakfast like a smart person would; and (b) it usually means that she won’t nap at all during the day. It’s hard to believe that, when she was new, she would nap at least twice a day. Anyway, the morning routine involves getting her washed, dressed, and fed, and somehow managing to sneak off for a shower. We don’t have a backyard, but there are a few parks within walking distance so when the weather cooperates that’s where we usually find ourselves. If I’m lucky she’ll take a nap on the way home, which means I usually have an hour or two of peace and quiet before Jill comes home. In the past I was a lot better at timing the baby’s naps for just before Jill arrived, which meant two hours of uninterrupted sex. Lately, though, there seems to be no pattern to her naps, and no predictability as to whether or not she takes one.
The blogging usually occurs in the morning while our daughter is playing or reading in her room, or distracted by a television show. It isn’t always easy to write with the television playing; if necessary I use noise-cancelling headphones and white noise to block out the repetition of the average children’s television show. Sometimes, however, I save the blogging for nighttime, typically when Jill is putting the baby to bed. During that time I am able to sit in silence and write without distraction.
It probably helps that I enjoy writing to begin with. I’ve been writing since I was around nine or ten years old. I write just about anything, though poetry isn’t my strong suit. It’s this love of writing, if not an aptitude for it, that makes it easy to blog every day. We are also motivated by a need to share openly, by our appreciation of this unique forum in which to discuss our enjoyment of sex without fear of judgment or ostracism. This is, in part, what keeps us going. We are proud of this blog, and while it takes a lot of effort to blog at this pace, it will be well worth it if it means having a record of our sex life to someday look back on.
This week, the three themes at The Naughty Hangout are “Leisure”, “Messy”, and “Solitude”. What you see below is me sitting on a patio chair on our balcony, enjoying a good book and a cup of coffee. On the rare occasion that I find myself with a half hour of leisure time and I want to be alone, this is where I go. And as for messy, as you can see from the picture the balcony is strewn with leaves, and even parts of the bedframe we broke during very vigorous sex last month.
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We posted a shot that was a bit similar for a TNH post in May. But one thing that this post has that that one lacked is a mouseover image. Be sure to check it out!
“You remember the time we met for drinks, back when I was still dating Vicky? We went to O’Neil’s, sat in the booth by the door and watched people playing pool all night. I drank Guinness, you had a martini.”
“So, oh-five, oh-six, then? I think so. You called me when you got out of class and I was just finishing my shift.”
“That’s the night I mean. I didn’t want to go back to an empty apartment.”
“Where was Miss Victoria that night, anyway?”
“Vegas for her best friend’s twenty-fifth birthday.”
“And out of every name in your cell phone you called the one person your girlfriend wouldn’t let you hang out with? You’re such a naughty boy.”
“No I’m not. Nothing happened.”
“You wanted it to, though.”
“Doesn’t matter what I wanted. I’m one-hunred percent faithful. Or I was, anyway.”
“You’d better still be, mister, if you know what’s good for you.”
“Well, to a different woman.”
“Damn right.”
“You looked really sexy that night.”
“You’d better believe I did. Nothing but the best for you.”
“And you say I’m the naughty one.”
“You are! You could have called Derek, Rodney, or any of the guys. You called me. You’re definitely the naughty one.”
“Yeah well, by the time we left the bar you were all over me.”
“Oh yeah. It was kind of a bummer to find out you could resist my charms.”
“Sorry. If it’s any consolation, it took everything I had.”
“Doesn’t matter. You’re powerless to resist me now.”
“I sure am. But that night I thought I was going to lose my mind. Remember you were singing that Pussycat Dolls song after your fourth martini.”
“That’s right! I used to love that song! I haven’t heard it in years.”
“You were so drunk. Sloppy drunk.”
“And instead of kissing me all you kept saying was how it was a rip-off of…somebody.”
“Sir Mix-a-Lot. And it’s pretty much the same song. Same hook, similar lyrics.”
“And then I started singing – “
“Baby Got Back! That’s right!”
“I was shaking my ass right in your face. I wanted to give you a lapdance but I couldn’t find your lap.”
“I had to practically carry you out of there. I kept worrying that you were going to throw up in my car.”
“I didn’t!”
“Can you imagine me trying to explain to Vicky why my car smells like puke?”
“She would have kicked your ass.”
“I could’ve said it was one of the guys but she wouldn’t have believed me.”
“Imagine what she would have done if she came home early and found me sleeping on the couch.”
“Whatever she would’ve done, it wouldn’t have been half as bad as it would’ve been if she found you in our bed.”
“Whether or not you were in it!”
“She would’ve kicked both of our asses.”
“She wasn’t any fun. Not like me, anyway.”
“Not nearly as hot, either.”
“I’ll second that, lover.”
“So you remember that night, right?”
“Uh, hello! I told you I remember it.”
“Remember the skirt you were wearing?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“Short, black leather, came down to just above your knees?”
“Yeah, I know the one. What about it?”
“You still have it? I want to see you in it sometime.”
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions come from the wacky, inventive, and sexually creative mind of the late phoenix.
Jack’s Answers
1. We are all incurable sex addicts, but name one thing—a job, a passion, a creative outlet, a collection—of yours you use as a replacement, a distraction from constantly thinking about sex 24/7.
There is literally nothing that serves this purpose for me. Make no mistake, I have a number of potential distractions, amongst them non-blog writing, reading, film, outdoor activities, cooking, and the day-to-day raising of my daughter. But of these activities, absolutely none of them have managed to successfully distract me from thinking about sex for more than a couple minutes at the absolute most. I kid you not, the typical thought in my head when I’m engaging in one of these activities is, “I wonder if I can somehow parlay this into getting laid.”
2. Have you ever loved somebody so much you thought having sex with them would actually sully the pristine purity of that love?
Of course. My mom.
Bonus: Tell us something sexy that happened to you this week.
Can’t think of a single thing, sadly. It was a pretty unsexy week in the Jack and Jill household, the weekend especially. Total bummer. Maybe this week will be hotter…
Jill’s Answers
1. We are all incurable sex addicts, but name one thing—a job, a passion, a creative outlet, a collection—of yours you use as a replacement, a distraction from constantly thinking about sex 24/7.
I would say that my job is the one thing that usually prevents me from constantly thinking about sex. I work with children, and that environment does not lend itself easily to sexual thought. However, Jack being Jack, I frequently find myself the recipient of a variety of lewd text messages, emails, links, and photos via my phone. He will do anything to redirect my mind to matters of a sexual nature.
2. Have you ever loved somebody so much you thought having sex with them would actually sully the pristine purity of that love?
No. I’m pretty sure that, while I have dated many men, the only one I ever really loved is Jack. By the time I realized how intense my feelings were, we had already had sex. At any rate, at least in my experience I don’t believe that sex has to sully anything. The love I feel for Jack makes the sex that we have more intense, and the sex makes our love stronger. Being physically intimate is just another way for us to express our love.
3. If you could make love to yourself, would you? Describe this experience in full detail.
Yes, I would definitely make love to myself. I’m hot. Who wouldn’t make love to me? I would start with a sensual massage to get myself in the mood. Being touched all over my body excites me, and makes it easier for me to have an orgasm. My hands would quickly be replaced by my lips and tongue. After being kissed all over, I would desire something more intense. Unfortunately I can’t fuck myself as I just don’t have the body parts for the job. I would probably opt to use a strap-on cock or maybe a double-ended dildo. If I could hold a vibrator on my clit at the same time, even better. There have been times when I’ve had really good orgasms with just a vibrator on my clit, and they’re usually more intense when I’m getting fucked at the same time.
Bonus: Tell us something sexy that happened to you this week.
Jack and I had a threesome. This week marks the birthday of M, our longtime friend and sometime third. She happens to be single at the moment, so we figured, what better way to celebrate? We had a nice dinner that was pretty much nonstop flirting and double-entendres. Then we came home and opened a bottle of wine, and then a couple more. I can’t even put into words how exciting it was to kiss and play with her. It had been so long. We hope it won’t be too long before it happens again.
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
It was revealed last week that, in addition to provisions limiting the rights of LGBT individuals and forcing the victims of rape to carry to term the children of their rapists, the 2012 Republican Party platform includes language promising the vigorous enforcement of current anti-pornography laws.
There are laws in place in the United States which make pornography illegal. I’m not talking about relatively tame scenes involving a man and a woman having sex; while there are those who would love nothing better than to eradicate even the nearly-wholesome output of studios like Vivid Video, its mainstream appeal makes cracking down on vanilla porn (for lack of a better descriptor) a hard sell. But I’m not talking solely about child pornography, either. Since the presidency of George W. Bush, the adult industry has seen strict measures put in place to make their product more difficult to produce and distribute.
In 2001, fear of criminal prosecution led to the creation of the Cambria List, a collection of sex acts considered at the time to be obscene in the eyes of the U.S. Justice Department; it was strongly recommended that these acts not be included in pornographic films. Today the items on the list seem arbitrary, nonsensical even, from such porn standards as facials, simulated rape, and degradation; to much less controversial elements such as food play and blindfolding.
“Wait a minute, Jack”, you may be saying. “The Founding Fathers didn’t have Three-in-the-Butt Sluts Volume 4 in mind when they drafted the Bill of Rights. They were talking about the right of the individual to speak his or her mind, question the government, and protest peacefully.” Hey, you know what? You may be right. But if we start nit-picking details and questioning the evolution of each amendment of the United States Constitution, i.e. what the authors had in mind versus the way it’s interpreted today, we couldn’t in good conscience bypass the fact that the Founding Fathers probably didn’t envision automatic weapons when they wrote the Second Amendment.
-Jill
