Though we haven’t blogged much this year – indeed, 2013 is on track to see publication of the fewest blog posts since this blog’s inception – and though we suspect there aren’t many individuals still reading our stuff, we wanted to take this opportunity to wish anyone who might stumble upon this page the happiest of holidays. Regardless of what holiday you celebrate during this time of year, we hope it finds you content. And if you don’t happen to celebrate a holiday, we still wish you happiness in general. Thank you for taking time out of your undoubtedly very busy lives to visit our blog.
This year, our wish lists are very short. I would like 2014 to include many more opportunities for non-monogamous play than I was able to enjoy in 2013. As we’ve stated elsewhere on this blog, what few opportunities presented themselves this year eventually fell through or otherwise did not deliver. Given the nature of our personal and professional lives, being open about my orientation toward non-monogamy and pursuing play partners locally would likely have dire consequences. Indeed my OKCupid profile is vague by necessity, without even a face picture. Judging by said profile, a potential partner might find me wishy-washy and non-committal. I am handcuffed, to an extent, by our need for discretion.
While we’re on the subject of discretion, another thing on my wish list is the ability to be open about my need for non-monogamy. I’m not talking about telling every person I meet that I’m on a constant quest for new pussy, but I do know that my life would be easier and generally less stressful if I didn’t have to hide who I really am behind a façade of conformity. The fact is, I am instinctually driven to want extramarital sex. At the very least, I require regular flirtation with women who are not my wife. This will never change, nor do I want it to change. As stated above, being open about this sort of thing would result in my wife being judged by her family, friends, and co-workers, i.e. viewed as a victim, or as a weak woman who can’t satisfy her husband. Were she to explain that we have an open relationship, she would be judged even more harshly, i.e. as a sexual deviant. Thus I understand that this wish is even less likely to come true than my previous one.
Jill’s Christmas wishes are a bit more likely to come true than my own. For starters, she’d like to be online more. She has tweeted very sporadically this year, especially over the last six months. She hasn’t really participated much in blogging. This is largely due to her work schedule being so hectic, to say nothing of the trials and tribulations that come from raising a small child. As our child grows older, our sleep schedule grows more precarious, and we frequently find ourselves exhausted. This is simply a fact of life. We only have one child at present, but we realize that the fatigue will only be compounded if/when we have another child. Additionally, there is a part of Jill that greatly fears the discovery of her double life. It would undoubtedly be the end of her career. This is a big part of the reason why she tweets less frequently than she once did.
Beyond tweeting, though, Jill really missed out on blogging in 2013. Last year, this blog was a much-needed venue where Jill could talk openly about her sexual self. Sex is a big part of who my wife is, and she feels that it is a side of herself that is worth honoring, or at the very least acknowledging. We have few friends with whom we can discuss our sex life. Having been raised in a traditional Catholic household and grown up with friends who were raised in similar circumstances, Jill has always valued her ability to share her sexual thoughts, feelings, and fantasies with the adult blogosphere, i.e. a vast community of like-minded individuals. Not having that outlet really took its toll on her this year. She hopes to correct this in 2014.
In closing, it seems that while our sexual exploits are unlikely to include the openness I desire, and in fact require, there’s a good chance you’ll be able to read about them with greater frequency in 2014 than you did in 2013. We hope this strikes you as good news. Once again, we wish you happiness during this holiday season, and all your hearts desire in 2014.
This week’s prompt
It’s actually sad that we have to be so careful to just be ourselves, because we fear we might be ‘discovered’ by the wrong people. I too have to be incredibly careful for anyone in my professional field to find out who I really am. Still. I hope you and Jill both manage to make some of your dreams come true for 2014.
Merry Christmas to you both!
Rebel xox
Children definitely complicate life, as I can attest with our three. My husband and I also have the need to be discrete about our sexual selves.
Hoping 2014 delivers all the naughtiness that you both desire.
I am so glad I don’t have to play the double life fiddle any more. It is an exhausting and fairly unsatisfactory existence. I hope 2014 brings you both your wishes and I look forward to lots more blogging from you
Mollyxxx
I know how hard it is also as discovery for me would end my career also!!!
All the very best to you and your family over the holidays and I for one will be following your posts!!!
~Mia~ xx
I can attest to the complication of kids… my photography really took a hit this past year now that the kids are older and stay up later (especially my 15yo who is up past midnight!). The blindness thing didn’t help either, though that is now at least resolved.
Merry Christmas and I wish you both the best in 2014!!
~Kazi xxx